So I haven't really figured anything out exactly...I just came to the realization that I was taking things way too seriously...everything was a big deal, not that I made things a big deal to the rest of the world (some things, yes) but most of it was arguments I had going in my head about where I really want to be when everything is said and done.
The answer is really simple...it always was. I want what everyone wants, to be happy. Just the same as so many other things...that is much easier said than done...especially for me...because I was always reaching for something bigger than I could really reach. People always say you can do anything but I'm getting realistic...I had to admit that even I have my limits, haha. And I think I always knew what I was doing...but I kept getting caught up in the little things...little discussions with my friends that turned into who's been hurt the most and who's had this or that...it was all so stupid because in the end it doesn't matter what we had then because it's gone now. It may have helped turn us into the people we are now, but that's all I need to know about it.
I know it's so cliche sounding to say, "Live every moment like it could be your last," but it's true. Our lives have the potential to change dramatically with every breath that we take...that fast. I'm not wasting any more breaths on being sad because something is missing...I am going to go get it...for the first time I feel like nothing is going to hold me back, and that really is all you need. The only person you need to have faith in you...is you. If you believe in yourself...no one can stand in your way. Let's be honest, it's always that much sweeter when people don't believe in you anyways...
So that's that..I'm done trying to make myself numb to things I think will bum me out...I want to feel everything because feeling keeps us living...I want to take risks, and make mistakes, I want to meet new people so that the all night dance parties get even more crazy, I want to take road trips to everywhere and nowhere, I want to take pictures so that I can show the world what I see because people don't appreciate how beautiful the simple things that we take for granted can be, I want to reach out and be reached out to...I feel like I'm finally in the right state of mind to really live.
Just in time.
Sweet Dreams World. I'll catch you in the morning. Be ready.
About Me
- Kayla Nicole
- I always have too much on my mind. I talk too fast. I love to laugh. I'm extremely shy until you get to know me, after which, I never shut up. I have a horrible tendency of not thinking before I speak, which inevitably means that I find myself in very awkward situations way too often. Writing and Photography are my escapes from this messed up world, neither of which I do often enough because I'm always studying for my next bio or chem exam. I'm indecisive like it's my job but I hate it when someone tries to tell me how or what to think. Yes, I believe my life is a series of contradictions sustained by my ability to create the possibly impossible.
No comments:
Post a Comment